Reincarnation Roulette
by Supersilver46
Summary: This is just a series of one-shots I had in mind of the CPUs reincarnating as Harry Potter characters, it'll be out of order on purpose.
1. Chapter 1

"Wow, aren't they so beautiful Harry?" Ron asked as he stared at the girls from Beauxbatons Academy. "Especially that girl down with them, I think her name was Fleur?"

"Er, yeah Ron," Harry said as he nervously looked at Hermione, "But do you think you could tone it down with the-"

"And just look at their impressive features!" Ron continued, "It makes them look so gorgeous!"

"Really, all I see are a bunch of bimbos." Hermione said as she glared at Ron, "I don't get what's so 'gorgeous' about them."

Ron frowned, "You're only saying that because you're as flat as a board!"

Harry facepalmed as Hermione's expression soon turned stormy,

"Who..." Hermione said as she tightly gripped Ron's shoulder, Ron gulped as Hermione brought his face close to hers, "...the hell are you calling flat you bastard!"

Harry winced as Hermione then rammed her leg into Ron's weak spot, sending the boy crumpling to the ground.

"My, my..."

Harry turned to see that Fleur was approaching them, and her breasts...bounced with every step she took.

"That seems a bit violent for a young girl such as you," Fleur said. "Shouldn't you have handled the situation with a bit more tact?"

Hermione's eye twitched as Fleur's breasts...bounced.

"Would you stop doing that?"

"Doing what?" Fleur asked as her breasts...bounced.

"You know exactly what you're doing." Hermione growled as she clenched her fists, "So quit it already."

"I'm not sure what you're talking about," Fleur said, "Honestly you should learn to watch your temper, otherwise you won't be a proper lady."

"A 'proper' lady?" Hermione growled as she clenched her fists, "I can't stand the high and mighty way you talk, thunder tits!"

"Thunder tits?" Fleur rose an eyebrow, "You know, I haven't been called long time..."

For some reason, it seemed as though there was some kind of mental conversation going on between the two, because Fleur suddenly smiled and grabbed Hermione's hand.

"Hey what the hell are you-" Hermione was red-faced as Fleur turned to Harry and smiled,

"I'm sorry but I'm going to need to borrow your friend for a moment," Fleur said, "Don't worry we'll be right back!"

"Uh-"

Harry couldn't say anything as Fleur dashed away with Hermione in tow. Ron groaned as he pushed himself to his feet and looked at Harry.

"What do you think that was all about?" Ron asked.

"I don't know..." Harry said, "it was kind of weird all things considered..."


	2. Chapter 2

Harry Potter wasn't exactly sure what to make of Hermione Granger, he knew that she was in his year...but other than that he didn't know too much about her. She seemed to make it her goal to be as unnoticeable as possible, she rarely spoke up in class, and when she did it was always a surprise to everyone around her. She also surprisingly short for her age, heck she was even shorter than him, which was a bit of a surprise considering that she was a full year older than him. You could spot her in the library from time to time, reading some book she would occasionally pull out and read.

The twins had taken a liking to pranking her, by either filling her hat with confetti, turning her hair blue, or doing anything that would annoy her. It was her reactions that the twins were looking for, but when they were in public Hermione wouldn't really react in a meaningful way. When they were in private...that was a different story altogether. Harry had once stumbled into the common room when Fred and George had played one of their pranks on Hermione, which had given him a front row seat to see what she was really like.

"Run Fred!" George had laughed as he and Fred raced passed by Harry, "She's almost gotten to us!"

"ARRGH, you little shits!" Hermione shouted as she chased after them with...a giant hammer? "Get back here so I can kill you!"

"Why, we just add some additions to your book!" Fred shouted, "We figured it needed a drawing or two!"

"That was my manuscript you piece of shit!" Hermione said. "It took me hours to make all those copies!"

"From what we read, they weren't all that great you know!"

"Y-you read my..." Hermione stopped chasing after the two boys, as her face became red.

"Yes, though it could use some work," George said, "I'm not too sure you could sell 500 copies with writing that bad!"

"S-shut up, just die already!"

Harry decided to carefully and quietly leave the common room...

After that...experience he'd ended up being slightly terrified of the girl, so when Ron insulted her on Halloween, his heart hammered in his chest as he stared at Hermione who was right behind them. Instead of getting out a hammer and bashing Ron's skull in, she instead pushed past them and rushed down the stairs.

"...I think she heard you." Harry said.

Then, a few hours later he found himself running alongside Ron as they rushed to warn Hermione about the troll Quirrell had shouted about. They reached the first girls' lavatory, only for said troll to end up crashing through the wall. The troll rolled along the floor for a good few feet before coming to a stop, seemingly killed by whatever was in the lavatory.

"Did you honestly think a low-level monster like you could beat me in a fight?!" Hermione said as she rested her hammer against shoulder. "Seriously how stupid could you be?!"

Hermione blinked as she noticed Harry and Ron watching her in silence.

"You know, on the one hand she seems pretty cool," Ron said, "But on the other hand, I think I'm terrified of her."


	3. Chapter 3

Ron Weasley knew that his family was rather...odd. For one, his twin brothers seemingly had affinity for either setting things on fire or freezing them outright. There wasn't a moment where Ron wouldn't end up slipping on a sheet of ice or finding a badly burnt lump that suspiciously looked like a spider. They also seemed to act as though they weren't their own ages. But even they weren't as chaotic as his youngest sibling, Ginny.

"Hey there big brother!" Ginny said as she walked into Ron's room, "Guess what I'm going to Hogwarts this year, isn't that great?!"

"Ginny shouldn't you have at least knocked?!" Ron shouted as he was startled out of his thoughts.

"What? Since when do protagonists have to knock on doors?" Ginny said as she tilted her head.

"Since I said so." Ron said. "Anyway, what are you doing in here?"

"Oh, you see dear brother I need your help with something!" Ginny smiled as she handed a small box, "I bought this at the store, and I'm going to need you to help me get it in my hair."

Ron looked down at the package and saw that it was purple hair dye, he looked back up at his sister who was busy playing with her 'handheld', whatever that was.

"You know mom will kill me if I help you with this." Ron said.

"Don't worry Ron, you've got unlimited continues!" Ginny said, "So even if she kills you, you'll just reset at your latest save point."

Ron sighed, he didn't understand the words that were coming out of his sister's mouth, in fact he hadn't been able to understand her for years on end. He wasn't sure where she had picked that weird language, but his father had seemed ecstatic that Ginny was just as interested in muggle technology and slang as he was.

"Okay I'll help you," Ron said, "But you better not tell mom that I helped you with this."

"Don't be worry too much Ron," Ginny said, "I won't tell a soul!"

Ron sighed as his sister grabbed his hand and led him to the bathroom, before he turned on the water for the bathtub and put the dye in her hair. As Ginny held her head under the water, Ron idly turned the box over and looked at the back of the box. In bright, colorful words, 'Permanent Dye' was written on the box. Ron felt his heart stop for a brief few moments as Ginny turned the water off and dried her hair.

"G-Ginny did you know this is permanent?!" Ron shouted.

"Don't worry Ron, it only lasts for about eight weeks." Ginny said as she finished drying her hair, "SO how do I look?"

"You look...weird." Ron said.

"Aw, you're mean." Ginny pouted, "I think I look like a proper protagonist!"

Ron sighed as Ginny left the bathroom, hopefully she wouldn't draw too much attention to herself at school...

"Ginny what happened to your hair?!" Ron heard his mother shout.

…. who was he kidding, she'd probably do something stupid once they got to school.


	4. Chapter 4

Ron couldn't help but nervously tap his foot on the floor of the cabin as he looked out the window.

"Could you please stop that?" Hermione softly asked as she peeked over her large book, "It's rather annoying."

"Right, sorry about that Hermione, I'll stop." Ron said as he stopped tapping his foot, and the cabin soon became quiet once again. Hermione sighed in relief and began to read her book, as she flipped to the next page, Ron started tapping his foot again, causing Hermione to grit her teeth in annoyance.

"Ron, what did I just say?" Hermione asked.

"S-sorry Hermione, I'll stop."

Hermione sighed and tried to read her book, but a few seconds later Ron continued his tapping. She gritted her teeth, slammed her book shut, and stood up from her seat as she marched over to Ron,

"Quit it already you asshole!" Hermione shouted as she grabbed the front of Ron's shirt, "Damnit, can't you understand English?!"

"I can't help it!" Ron shouted as grabbed Hermione's arms, "My sister's going to Hogwarts this year!"

"Why is that a problem?" Harry asked, "Shouldn't you be happy that your sister is going to Hogwarts?"

"You don't understand!" Ron shouted, "You haven't really met her, if you had you'd be freaking out too!"

"Honestly Ron, you should grow up," Hermione said as she let go of Ron's shirt, causing him to tumble to the ground. "I doubt your sister's that ba-"

"Hello fellow protagonists!" Ginny shouted as she slid open the door to the train compartment, "How are you all doing on this very fine morning?"

"...I'm guessing that's your sister Ron?" Hermione said as she looked at Ron's pale face. Ron slowly nodded as Ginny took a seat next to Harry.

"Hey there, we met last year and I'm pretty sure you remember me." Ginny said. "Given my amazing personality and all that jazz."

Harry blinked, "Didn't you have red hair?"

"If I kept it red, I'd look like a generic NPC." Ginny said, "And who'd play a game where the protagonist looks like a generic character?"

"But why purple?" Hermione asked, "It seems like an odd choice for a hair color."

"Exactly! The odder the hair color, the more you stand out!" Ginny said, "That's basic JRPG knowledge!"

"Well, I can't really argue with that kind of logic." Hermione said.

Ron looked at Hermione, in complete awe, "You understand her?!" he shouted, "How is that even possible?!"

"It's probably because she plays video games Ron," Ginny said, "That and she's a reincarnation of an old friend of mine!"

"...What?" Ron said.

"Idiot, why the hell would you spoil the plot so soon?!" Hermione shouted.

"Hey, don't blame me, the author already made it totally obvious!" Ginny pouted, "I only read ahead by a _tiiiny_ bit, I'm sure it won't affect anything in the long run...I think."

"You think?!"

"Don't worry I'm sure everything will turn out just fine," Ginny said, "Besides, we're properly leveled enough to handle whatever gets thrown our way!"

Draco Malfoy sneezed as he drafted his plan to destroy the reincarnated CPUs, he rubbed his nose and looked around.

"I think someone's talking about me."


	5. Chapter 5

"Hey Blanc?"

"I thought I told you to call me Hermione."

"Oh really, I guess I forgot." Ginny said, "Anyway, do you get this sense of impending doom, or is it just me?"

"It's just you." Hermione said as she went back to reading her book, "Now could you be quiet, I want to finish this chapter before we get to school."

"Aw, but I wanted to talk to you, we haven't seen each other in, like, a billion years!" Ginny pouted.

"We'll talk later; besides it's only been a thousand years since then," Hermione said, "I'm pretty sure you can find something to amuse yourself with."

"Ugh, you suck." Ginny said as she leaned back in her seat. She wished that something exciting would happen, but it wasn't as though something would come bursting through the doors trying to kill them.

"Ahem, I said it wasn't like anything would come through the door to kill us!"

"Who are you talking to?" Harry asked.

"Don't bother asking her Harry," Hermione said as she flipped through another page, "It's most likely some fourth wall breaking joke."

"...Wha-"

Suddenly the door was blown off its hinges, revealing a smirking Malfoy on the other side.

"I found you!" Draco shouted, "This time there will be no escape for you!"

"I will finally claim my victory over you CPUs and then-"

"Finally, I was hoping something exciting would happen!" Ginny shouted as she leapt up from her seat, "Alright, so what do you have up your sleeve this time Arfoire?"

"I... wait how did you even know it was me?" Draco asked.

"Duh, it was obvious by the moment you went on your usual 'I will destroy you CPUs!' rant," Ginny said, "And honestly after the way the last chapter ended, it wasn't a surprise for the readers either."

"Whatever, now that you can't transform, it'll be easy to crush you brats!" Draco shouted, "Sure I can't use most of my spells, I can't reach my ultimate form, and I can barely use magic, but that doesn't matter!"

"Today I will finally-"

"Shut up already!" Hermione roared as she pulled out her hammer and rammed it into Draco's stomach, sending him flying out of the compartment.

"Aw, why'd you have to go and do that?" Ginny pouted, "And I was just about to get some easy experience points."

"I could care less," Hermione said as the train came to a stop, "Anyway we're here so let's just get going already."

"Aw you're no fun." Ginny complained as she, Ron, and Harry followed Hermione out of the train...


	6. Chapter 6

"Well, well, yet another CPU to join the fray." The sorting hat said in Ginny's mind, "Like the one I sorted before you, you are qualified for more than one house..."

"Well I did save the world on more than one occasion," Ginny said, "So that's got to count for something right?"

"Yes, you show clear signs of bravery, loyalty..."

"Aw, you can lighten up on the praise," Ginny said as she rubbed the back of her head, "I mean I know I'm amazing and all but-"

"You also show signs of laziness, stupidity, recklessness...honestly I have no idea how someone like you managed to save the world."

"Hey now, that was really mean!"

"Yes, the best house for someone like you would be..."

"Gryffindor!"

"NOO!" Ron shouted as Professor McGonagall took the sorting hat off of his sister's head. His sister then walked over to the Gryffindor table and took a seat next to Ron, Harry, and Hermione.

"Hey Ron, don't you think three exclamation marks is overdoing it?" Ginny asked, "I'm pretty sure you just blew out your own ears."

"What?!" Ron shouted, "I can't hear you, speak up!"

"Anyway," Hermione ignored Ron and turned to Ginny, "What are we going to do about Malfoy?"

"Who?"

"Maloy, the guy I sent flying, what are we going to do about him?"

"Oh...I don't know." Ginny shrugged, "He doesn't seem to be a problem."

"Well-"

"Well, well, look at you two talking about someone behind their backs," Draco said as he walked up to the table, his two goons flanked his sides, "Didn't your parents tell you it's rude to gossip?"

"What do you want Malfoy?" Hermione growled as she got out of her seats, "Are you here to start something?"

"Temper, temper, I'm here to call a truce." Draco said, and he pulled something out from behind his back, revealing a bowl filled with a purple substance, "See I even brought a 'Truth pudding' to show that I'm being honest."

Hermione scoffed, "Do you think we're that-"

"Did you say pudding?!" Ginny interrupted as she looked at the bowl of purple pudding.

"Why yes, I remember how much you loved pudding, so I made some especially for you," Draco said, "It's made from the best ingredients Malfoy money can buy."

"Nep-Ginny please don't tell me you're that stupid to actually-"

"I'll take it!"

"...I forgot who I was dealing with." Hermione sighed as Ginny took the pudding and started to eat it.

"Wow, this is so good!" Ginny shouted, 'What's in this?"

Draco smiled, "Eggplant."

"PWHSSS!" Ginny spat the pudding out onto the table, "Eggplant?!"

"Of course, I knew how much you hate eggplant, so I just had to use it in my plan!" Draco shouted as he backed away , "Crabbe, Goyle, they're distracted so now's your chance!"

"Our chance to do what boss?" Goyle asked Malfoy.

"Yeah, you never mentioned what we were supposed to do." Crabbe said.

"Ugh! Just hurry up and beat them up, I-" Draco felt something slick and slimy hit his face, before falling to the floor.

"You ruined my favorite food..." Ginny growled as stuck her spoon into the pudding and pulled back on it, "You'll pay for your crimes Malfoy!"

Ginny took a deep breath and shouted, "For the pudding!" as she launched another glob of pudding at Draco, who dodged the projectile which hit a girl sitting at the Slytherin table in the face.

"Who did that?!" The girl shouted before she saw Ginny, "So you think it's funny to throw food Gryffindor?!"

The girl grabbed some food from her tray and threw it at Ginny...or at least she tried to. Instead her food hit Hermione in the chest. Hermione looked down at her ruined clothes and clenched her fists in anger.

"The hell's your problem?!" Hermione shouted as she grabbed food from Harry's tray, "Learn to aim, bitch!"

Hermione threw the ball of food at the girl at the Slytherin table, which directly entered the girl's mouth. The girl's eyes widened as she coughed out the food, and Ginny turned to Hermione for a high-five.

"Nice shot, Hermio-"

Hermione threw food at Ginny, which hit her in the face.

"Hey what's your problem?!" Ginny shouted.

"This whole thing is your fault, you started this!" Hermione shouted, "So I'm pissed off at you too!"

Hermione threw another piece of food at Ginny, who dodged to the side.

"Fine, if you're going to be that way, I'll fight you too!" Ginny said as she threw food at Hermione, before wincing as a piece of food hit the back of her head.

"Don't forget that I'm here too!" The girl from the Slytherin table shouted as she grabbed another piece of food, "I'm going to make you both pay!"

What followed was a three-way food fight between the three girls, which eventually caused everyone in the great hall to start throwing food.

"Um, boss was this your plan all along?" Crabbe asked Malfoy as the three of them were huddled under the table.

"Of course I did you fool!" Draco shouted, "Everything is going exactly the way I planned for, OHOHOHO-!"


	7. Chapter 7

"This is all your fault!" The three girls in Dumbledore's office shouted at each other before they started to argue with one another.

"If you hadn't had thrown that pudding at me-"

"Well if you hadn't had been in the way-"

"If you had actually listened to me-"

"Alright girls, that's enough." Dumbledore said.

"Well it's not my fault you couldn't keep your stupid mouth shut!"

"It's not my fault that I was defending myself from you brutes!"

"Hey, who are you calling a brute?!"

"Girls?" Dumbledore tried to get the three girls attention, but they ignored him and kept arguing,

"Well that's rich coming from a snake like you!"

"Excuse me?! What do you mean by that, Gryffindor?!"

"It means what you think it means!"

"That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Your face doesn't make any sense!"

"What kind of a comeback is-"

"Girls!" Dumbledore shouted, as he finally managed to gain their attention. The three girls sheepishly looked at the Headmaster as he sighed.

"How about we start from the beginning?" Dumbledore asked, "You say that Mr. Malfoy is the cause behind the incident?"

Ginny nodded her head, "Yeah he's the one who started everything," She said, "He should be here too!"

"From what I saw Weasley," Professor Snape, who was standing next to Professor McGonagall, "You were the one to start throwing food after Mr. Malfoy gave you a bowl of pudding."

"Well...he tricked me!" Ginny shouted, "He gave me eggplant flavored pudding, and...ugh I can still taste it..."

Ginny's face became green as she felt sick to her stomach, before she rushed over to the trash can and emptied out the contents of her stomach.

Daphne crinkled her nose in disgust as she heard Ginny's retching and tried her best to tune the girl out.

"Well headmaster, as you can see this entire situation was her fault," Daphne said, "So I'm not sure why I have to be punished too."

"Did you forget the fact that you were throwing food too?" Professor McGonagall said, "We aren't going to let you off with the slap of a wrist if that was what you were hoping for."

"B-but it wasn't my fault!" Daphne protested.

"Regardless of Mr. Malfoy's intentions, you three were the ones who instigated the fight," Dumbledore said, "As such your punishment will be to help Mr. Flich clean the entire hall."

"What?!"

"I understand headmaster," Hermione said.

"You're just accepting this?!" Daphne rounded on Hermione.

Hermione shrugged, "It's a fair punishment," She said, "It's called 'taking responsibility for your actions', I can see how someone like you might not have heard it before."

"What's with that smug tone?!"

Sensing another argument brewing, Dumbledore quickly intervened before they got off track again.

"In addition, you will not be allowed to use magic," Dumbledore said, "You'll have to make do with using our cleaning supplies."

Dumbledore smiled at the shocked look on Daphne's face.

"I wish you the best of luck."

…

"'I wish you the best of luck'" Daphne muttered under her breath, "Of course he'd say something like that..."

"Hey girlie, quit talking to yourself and get to cleaning!" Flich shouted from the chair he was resting on. "I haven't got all night you know!"

"Shouldn't you be cleaning too?!"

"I'm taking a break."

"Why don't we get any-"

Daphne winced as Flich placed his fingers in his mouth and sharply whistled.

"Okay, okay I'll get back to work..." Daphne sighed as she went back to cleaning the Slytherin table.

"Hey Hermione!" Ginny shouted, "Check this out!"

Ginny slid around the floor as she used the sponges under her feet as makeshift ice skates.

Flich whistled again, "Hey are you having fun?!" he shouted, "Because if you are, I'll make you do something really boring!"

"No sir, I'm definitely not having any fun!" Ginny shouted back, "This is the most boring thing I've ever done in my life!"

"Good! I'm glad to see that you aren't having any fun!"

"You've got to be kidding me..." Daphne's eye twitched as Ginny continued to skate around the room.

"Hey book girl, what did I tell you?!" Flich shouted, "You have to put some backbone into your cleaning!"

Hermione stiffened and continued to wipe at the wall with more force than necessary.

"At the rate you're all going it'll be a miracle if you finish before sunrise!" Flich shouted, "Hurry up, Ms. Norris is waiting for me to give her a bath!"

Daphne sighed, at least things couldn't get any worse, right? She winced as she felt a piece of food hit her on top of her head. She looked up to see that pieces of food had somehow gotten stuck on the ceiling, another piece of food fell from the ceiling and hit her in the face.

Flich whistled again, "Get back to work!"


	8. Chapter 8

Hermione sighed as she waited for her mother to arrive. Hermione impatiently tapped her foot as an hour soon ticked by, and her mother showed no signs of showing up.

"She probably forgot she was supposed to pick me up..." Hermione muttered as she sat on one of the benches in the station, "This is just great..."

Hermione didn't know why she felt somewhat surprised, her mother was quite the forgetful type. Anything that wasn't important to her mother was quickly filed away for things that seemed more important, like her job as a dentist. Her mother's job came first, and Hermione came second.

"This is why I didn't want to come home..."

"Hello!"

Hermione was startled as someone suddenly called out to her. She saw that Ginny was standing in front of her with a cheery smile on her face. Ginny sat next to Hermione and started a one-sided conversation.

"So..." Ginny said, "How are you doing?"

"...I'm fine." Hermione said.

"You don't look like you're fine," Ginny said, "You're sitting here alone and being all gloomy."

"..."

"C'mon cheer up, Christmas isn't that far away!" Ginny said, "Where's your holiday spirit?"

"I'm not in the mood," Hermione said, "I've never really liked Christmas that much anyway."

"What?!"

"Keep your voice down!" Hermione shouted, as Ginny shriek had caused the people at the station to give the girls odd looks.

"But I can't believe you don't like Christmas, it's like the best holiday ever!" Ginny said, "Back in preschool you used to go on and on about how much you loved it!"

"Well that was then, and this is now," Hermione said, "I've grown up, Christmas doesn't mean that much to me anymore."

Ginny pursed her lips, as though she had eaten something sour. "Bleh, you've gotten really boring Hermione." she said, "What happened to the fun girl I knew back then?"

"I grew up Ginny," Hermione said, "And... what's with that look?"

For some reason Ginny looked a bit disappointed.

"Hey, you don't have to call me by my new name," Ginny said after a few minutes of silence, "We've known each other for a long time, why don't you call me Neptune?"

"I-" Hermione paused

"Well..." Ginny trailed off, "You don't have to call me Neptune if you don't want to."

"Well Ginny, I thought you were staying at the castle?" Hermione asked, "What are you doing here?"

"Oh I'm just getting away for a bit, I'll head straight back later," Ginny said.

Ginny looked up and held her hand out. "Oh look it's snowing!"

Hermione looked up to see that large snowflakes were falling from the sky, they landed on the platform and stuck to the ground. The people in the station either pulled out their umbrellas for protection from the snow, or they pulled the hoods of their coats over their heads. Some of the children stuck their tongues out to catch the falling snowflakes, ignoring their parents who told them to stop. Hermione smiled a little bit, as she was reminded of the things she used to do when she was younger.

"Hermione?"

Hermione blinked to see that her mother was walking towards her, holding an umbrella in her hand.

"What are you doing sitting here alone?" Her mother said. "I've been looking for you everywhere."

"What? But I'm not sitting here...alone?" Ginny had apparently decided to leave her alone, and Hermione was a bit confused.

Hermione's mother sighed, "Alright Hermione let's get going, I wouldn't want you to catch a cold."

Hermione's mother turned around and began to walk out of the station.

Hermione stood up and was ready to follow her when she felt something in her pocket. She reached her hand in her pocket and pulled out a black mobile phone with an antenna. She had heard some of her classmates talking about this kind of phone before she went to Hogwarts, apparently it was some kind of 'flip-phone' being developed by a company called Motorola. Everyone had been excited about it, not that Hermione really cared about that kind of thing, she didn't really have anyone to call anyway. Attached to the back of the phone was a sheet of paper that had writing on it.

'I got this really early for you, consider it an early Christmas present! P.S, I put my number down so you can call me whenever you like!'- N

"Hermione, hurry up!"

Hermione shoved the phone back into her pocket and followed after her mother...

...Wait how would Ginny even get her phone to work at the castle? And where did she even get the money to buy one?

…

"Hey Ginny, where have you been?" Ron asked as Ginny walked into the common room.

"Oh, I've been out," Ginny said.

"...Doing what?"

"Nothing you need to know about," Ginny said, "I was just catching up with a friend."

"Well that's nice..." Ron blinked as Ginny handed him a few knotts, "What's this for?"

"I'm just paying for that loan I took from your allowance."

"Well thank yo-" Ron blinked, "Wait, Ginny how much money did you take?"

"Not that much, just most of everything you've saved since your seventh birthday."

"What?!"

"Aw, Ron but it was a gift for Hermione!" Ginny shouted, "Where's your Christmas spirit?"

"Why you little... get back here Ginny!" Ron shouted as he chased after his sister. Harry looked up from the book he was reading and sighed.


	9. Chapter 9

"Ron I'm _bored_!" Ginny complained, "There's nothing to do!"

"Why don't you play on your gaming thing?" Ron said as he focused on his chess match with Harry, "You like using it."

"But you took it away and hid it somewhere!"

"Oh that's right, I did." Ron said as he watched Harry capture his rook, "You remember why I took it away from you?"

"I said I was sorry for taking your money!" Ginny shouted, "What else do you want from me?"

"I want my money back, but that's not going to happen anytime soon," Ron said as he captured Harry's king, "Checkmate."

Harry sighed as he marked down 0-10 on a piece of paper.

"Look, Ginny why don't you go read a book or something?" Ron asked, "It might do you some good to read a book instead of playing games all day."

"I don't want to read a book, books are boring!" Ginny whined.

"How about this? If you read today, I'll give you your gaming thing back."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Alright then Ron, I'll go grab a book from the library!" Ginny said, "You better keep your word!"

Harry waited until Ginny had left the room before he turned to Ron with his eyebrow raised,

"Really? Was that the best you could do?" Harry asked.

"What?" Ron asked, "I thought it was a good way to punish her."

Ron then set the chessboard back into position, and the two friends began another round. Harry decided to ask a question that was on his mind as Ron easily captured two of his pawns.

"How is reading a book supposed to punish someone?"

"Well, today the library is filled with non-fictional books," Ron smirked, "Apparently Madam Prince is hosting her first 'non-fictional' book day, anyone who goes into the library isn't allowed to leave until they've read at least one book."

"Oh..." Harry winced as he realized that Ron purposefully waited until today to spring his trap for Ginny.

"There's nothing Ginny hates more than reading books about 'boring' things." Ron's smirk grew wider and he looked in the direction Ginny had gone in, "And she can't back down, otherwise she'll never get her games back."

"Isn't revenge the best Harry?"

Harry spun the board around while Ron was distracted and used the pieces to surround the king.

"That's right Ron, oh and by the way..." Harry smirked and captured the king, "Checkmate."

…

Daphne Greengrass sighed as she put away another book she had read on the shelf.

"Nothing useful was in that book either..." Daphne sighed, "I was really hoping that I'd at least find something that'd help me..."

So far, she'd learned all sorts of irrelevant facts about this world, like how Dumbledore was supposedly gay, but she hadn't found anything noteworthy. Which was surprising since she was specifically looking for history books. It was as if someone had gone out and erased everything that had happened prior to the _incident_. She couldn't ask Draco, he'd most likely lie straight to her face and try to kill her, which would be more of annoyance than a hinderance.

She knew that this world wasn't too different from her own. Despite the fact that they were way behind the technical prowess they had achieved in her world, the people here seemed to behave exactly like her own citizens had done back in Lastation.

There was also the matter of share energy to consider as well. It was faint, but she could still feel the energy coursing through the air. It was strange that a world that didn't praise the goddesses still had faint traces of share energy. She reached for another book on the shelf and then-

"Hi there!"

"Eek!" Daphne jumped in the air and whirled around to see that Nep- Weasley was standing behind her with a small smile on her face.

"Whoa, you're really jumpy," Weasley said.

"What do you want?!" Daphne shouted, ignoring Madam Prince's ' _shh!'_ "Were you trying to give me a heart attack?!"

"I was looking for a book to read," Weasley said, "And I'd thought I'd say hello, by the way do you know where the manga are?"

"Manga?" Daphne blinked.

"Yeah, my brother wants me to read a book if I want to get my handheld back," Weasley said, "So I thought I'd read some manga, it's technically a book."

"For one, the library doesn't have any manga," Daphne said, "And two, today's the 'non-fictional' book day."

"Non-fictional? That sucks..."

"Hey where do you think you're going?" Daphne asked as Weasley turned to leave, "You can't leave until you've read at least one book."

"What?!" Weasley shouted, ignoring Madam Prince's ' _shh!',_ "So that's why he wanted me to come here today, he's being really petty just because I borrowed his money without asking him."

"It sounds like you deserve it though," Daphne pointed out. "Only an idiot would do something like that."

"Ouch, you're really coldhearted." Weasley said, "No wonder you don't have any friends."

"I have friends!"

"Really? Name one."

"Uh, well there's...um..." Daphne bit her lip, "I don't need to prove anything to you!"

"So, you don't have any friends..." Weasley said as she smirked, "It looks like you're the same old Noire."

"Wipe that smug look off your face Neptune!"

"Make me."

"That's such a childish comeback and you know it!"

"Well... uh-oh."

"What?" Daphne asked. Weasley's face had gone pale as she looked behind Daphne. Daphne turned around to see that Madam Prince was looming over the two of them. The librarian pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose and smiled at the two.

"Now girls, you seem to be having fun," Madam Prince said, "The two of you were so loud that I could hear you all the way from my desk."

"Do you know what that means?"

"That you have exceptional hearing?" Weasley said.

"It means you were shouting," Madam Prince said, "Do you know what my number one rule is?"

"No shouting..." Daphne said.

"And do you know what you were doing?"

"Shouting..." Daphne took a step back from the librarian.

"Well now that we're all on the same page," Madam Prince smirked, "I'd like you to prepare for your punishment."

"While that sounds nice, we have somewhere to be." Weasley said as she grabbed Daphne's hand and started to run, "Bye!"

"Do you honestly believe you can escape me?!" Madam Prince shouted as she ran after the two girls, "I'll chase you to the ends of the earth!"


	10. Chapter 10

"So how did you do on Snape's test?"

"I did pretty well, how did you do?"

"I failed again..."

"Oh, well I'm sure you'll be able to bring your grade up eventually!"

Snape sighed as he watched his group of first year students talk about their test scores. Naturally, most of his Slytherins had passed the test with flying colors, and most of the Gryffindors had failed. Normally, he'd lord it over McGonagall during their usual staff meetings, but this time he had to deal with a certain student.

"Ms. Weasley, where do you think you're going?" Snape asked as she tried to sneak out of his classroom, "I believe I told you we needed to have a little...talk."

"Ah, well you see Professor, I was just...holding the door open for my fellow classmates!" Weasley shouted, "With all those books they have to carry, holding the door open can really help them out!"

"I'm sure they can manage Ms. Weasley," Snape said, "I'd like you to take a seat."

"Oh, I'm fine with stand-"

" _._ "

"Yes Professor!"

Snape sighed as he shut the door to his classroom. He then turned to the nervous girl who was fidgeting in her seat.

"Ms. Weasley, I have seen many students come and go during my many years of teaching here at Hogwarts," Snape began, "But I do not think I have ever seen a student fail one of my tests so miserably."

"But I think congratulations are in order Ms. Weasley, because you are the first student in my class to have gotten a negative Troll on a test, it's a remarkable feat for a student to perform so poorly on a test that a new grade had to be invented." Snape said as he put the test on the desk, "I'm sure your mother will be pleased to know that this moment will go down in history, who could imagine that it was possible to score below zero?"

"About that..." Weasley rubbed the back of her head, "You don't really need to tell her about my grades, do you?"

"Heh..." Snape tried to stop himself from smiling, but in the end, he couldn't help but break out into laughter

"You're right Ms. Weasley, I don't need to tell her," Professor Snape said after he stopped laughing, "But I will."

.

.

.

"...which is why you have to let me use your cloak!" Ginny shouted, "Otherwise my mom will get that letter!"

"To be honest, it sounds like you put yourself in this situation Ginny," Harry said as he desperately tried to win against Ron in their chess match, "You should've studied instead of staying up all night to play video games."

"Yeah, a Howler from mom might be a good thing," Ron said as he captured three of Harry's pieces, "You have to learn to take responsibility for your actions."

"So, you aren't going to help me?" Ginny said, "You're just going to leave me to face her wrath?!"

"Yeah, that's exactly what I'm going to do."

"Well then, if you don't help me, I guess I'll have to tell mom about those magazines you like." Ginny said.

"What's wrong with the magazines he likes?" Hermione asked as she looked at Ron who had started to sweat.

"Oh, you know those magazines guys like to read 'for the articles'?" Ginny asked, "Well Ron's got a whole bunch of them in his room."

"S-so, it's not like you know where I hid them," Ron said, "Besides, I really do read the magazines for the articles!"

"Oh, so I guess that this magazine doesn't belong to you?" Ginny said as she reached into her pocket, she tossed the magazine onto the chessboard.

"'Busty Blonde Witches monthly?'" Harry said as he picked the magazine up, "'Inside you'll see ten tips on how to get a girl to be more than your friend'."

"W-where did you get that?!" Ron shouted as he snagged the magazine out of Harry's hand.

"Oh Ron, your sneak skill was so low that I followed you to your hiding place during summer break, I'm guessing your perception level is pretty low too." Ginny said, "Anyway, if you don't want mom to find out, then you better help me!"

"Well I still..." Ron trailed off as he felt a surge of killing intent. He nervously turned around to see that Hermione was glaring at him.

"'Busty Blonde Witches monthly?' So, you can't open up a textbook for more than a few minutes, but you can read trash like this?" Hermione growled, "Are you kidding me?!"

"Actually, let's go stop Snape from sending that letter!" Ron said, "C'mon Harry, we're going to need you and your cloak!"


	11. Chapter 11

Percy Weasley yawned as he patrolled the halls of the castle, no one would be able to sneak by him!

"Hey Percy," his partner said as she rubbed her eyes, "We've been going up and down this hall for hours, no one's here!"

"You never know," Percy said as he scanned the hallway, "Some rulebreakers could be coming down the hall as we speak."

"If we didn't see anyone the last time we came down this hall, I doubt that-"

"Who's there?!" Percy shouted as he lit the tip of his wand, he knew that he heard footsteps, but he couldn't see anyone, but there was a large cardboard box that rested against the wall.

"Why are you being so paranoid?" His partner asked as "It's just a stupid box."

"A box?"

Percy sighed, he'd really been hoping that he'd catch a rulebreaker.

"Oh well I guess we can move on," Percy said.

As the two of them left the hallway, they didn't notice the box stand up and walk away...

Severus Snape whistled a jolly tune to himself as he walked down the stairs that lead to the Mail room. Underneath his arm, he held a bundle of thick envelopes that he planned to send to the parents of the students that had miserably failed his test. Most of them were either failing or were on the verge of failing his class, and he figured that a howler would set the students back on track. He had to admit though, he was looking forward to watching Wealsey get her howler.

"Hmm?" Snape stopped and looked behind him, for a brief moment he thought that he heard someone cough. But it seemed like he was the only one walking down the stairs. Snape shrugged and opened the door to the mail room, he felt like it may have been his imagination.

"Oh, hello Severus," Professor Flitwick greeted him as he handed an envelope to an owl, "How are you doing tonight?"

"I'm fine," Snape said, "I just need to send these letters."

"Those sure are a lot of letters," Professor Flitwick commented as he looked at the envelopes under Snape's arm, "I suppose quite a number of students failed your test?"

"Yes, I'm sending these letters out to their parents," Snape said, "Perhaps a few stern words from their parents will encourage them to perform better."

"Maybe," Professor Flitwick said, "By the way Severus, do you know what that box is for?"

He pointed to a cardboard box that sat in the corner of the room.

"It's been sitting there for hours, and no one has come to pick it up," Professor Flitwick said, "I wonder why?"

"Perhaps they didn't notice it?"

"Really? It sticks out like a sore thumb."

"I didn't notice that it was there until you had pointed it out," Snape said, "They must have used a Disillusionment Charm..."

If that was the case though, then he had a sneaking suspicion that he knew what the box was for. Snape walked over the box and lifted it up from the ground.

"!"

"Uh, hello Professor Snape, Professor Flitwick," Ron said as he stood up, "How are you doing on this fine night?"

"What are you doing here Weasley?" Snape asked, "You should be in your room, you're past your curfew."

"Oh well, you see I couldn't sleep so I thought that I'd come down here." Ron said.

"You came down here to sleep under a cardboard box," Snape said, "Do you honestly expect me to believe you?"

"What can I say? Mail just...turns me on."

"What?"

Ron's statement confused Snape so much that he didn't notice the envelopes getting taken.

"I'm not one to question what...turns on a student," Flitwick cringed, "But if you had trouble sleeping you could have just taken an envelope and slept in your room."

"Oh, I didn't think about that," Ron said, he stretched and tried to walk past Snape, "Well I'll go back to the common room, goodni-"

"Where do you think you're go-" Snape had placed his hand on Ron's shoulder, when he suddenly noticed that the envelopes that had been under his arm had mysteriously vanished.

"I see," Snape glared at the boy, who shrunk back in fright, "Your true goal was to steal the letter I was going to send to your mother, wasn't it?"

"I-I uh, y-you know I-I uh," Ron gasped as he looked behind Snape, "What are you doing Harry?!"

"Potter?!" Snape whirled around in surprise, and Ron took that chance to escape as he shoved Snape aside.

"You won't get far Weasley!" Snape shouted as he started to chase after the boy, only to trip over his own shoelaces.

"What the hell?!"

"You know it's kind of sad that you don't know how to tie your shoes," Flitwick said, "Then again, maybe all that grease messed up your brain."

"Why are you just standing there?!" Snape shouted, "Help me, Weasley's getting away!"

"Why would I help you catch my own brother?" Flitwick asked.

"What do you mean 'your own brother'? You aren't related!"

Flitwick smirked and tugged his face off and threw it onto the ground.

"Weasley?!"

"I'm a pretty great actor, aren't I?" Weasley asked as she took of the rest of the disguise off, "Anyway I've got to go, thanks for the letters!"

"Why you little-" Snape tried to grab her leg as she dashed out of the mail room, but she darted to the side and avoided his grasp. Snape grit his teeth in anger and stood back up, "Get back here!" he shouted as he hopped after the girl...

"Hey, do you hear that?" Percy asked his partner, "It sounds like someone's coming our way!"

"Percy you did this last time, there's no way that-"

She blinked as Percy lit his wand, and she saw someone running towards them.

"Ah ha!" Percy shouted, "I was right to check this hallway, I'll accept your apology once we catch him."

Percy cleared his throat and held his wand out.

"Stop in the name of-"

Ron barreled into him, sending the two crashing to the ground. Percy's glasses fell off and hit the ground, his wand rolled out of his hands, and the one source of lighting faded. Percy squinted as he tried to see who was on top of him.

"Ron?!" Percy shouted in surprise as he looked at his younger brother, "What are you doing?!"

"Sorry Percy I can't talk right now!" Ron said as he scrambled to his feet and ran away.

"Ron I'm going to-"

Someone tripped and fell on top of Percy, knocking him back down.

"Ginny?!"

"Hey Percy, I'm being chased so I can't really waste any time," Ginny said as she got to her feet, "Bye!"

"Ginny get back here!" Percy said as he got to his feet.

He grabbed his wand and got ready to stun her, when he heard footsteps behind him. Thinking that it was another student, he fired the stunner into the darkness. Upon hearing someone hit the ground, Percy picked up his glasses and walked over to the person he'd stunned.

"So, you thought that you'd get past me?" Percy asked, "I may have let the other two go, but I'm going to march you straight to Dumbledore!"

He blinked as he lit up the hallway, to find an unconscious Professor Snape.

"We should run." Percy's partner said.

Percy nodded and the two ran after Ron and Ginny, leaving the Professor alone in the hallway...

"We are never doing that again!" Ron said as the two of the slipped into the common room, "Never!"

"Hey, you have to admit that it was fun to mess with Snape," Ginny said, "And on the bright side, your sneak stat just got raised, keep it up and you might get your own sneaking game!"

"I-" Ron sighed and decided to ignore that comment, "Hey Harry are you here?"

"Yeah," Harry said as he pulled off his invisibility cloak, "I can't believe that we actually pulled that off."

"Never underestimate the power of cardboard boxes!"


End file.
